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Thursday, February 26, 2015

Were Sorry



I have taken up a new hobby of Telemark skiing. Since I want to be as safe as possible I wanted releasable telemark bindings in the unlikely event I may fall. Turns out only one manufacture in the world makes such a device. The only place I could find them was in France. I was a little apprehensive about ordering something over the internet from Europe, paying in Euros and having it shipped from France. My apprehensions were unfounded. The company immediately shipped the bindings and it took 2 days to get them to Rochester. Then it took DHL 3 days to get them from the Rochester Airport to my house. What tripped them up was the shipper in France put Honeoye vs Honeoye Falls on the outside of the package (the zip code was correct). Never the less the delivery guy felt obliged to get in the face of and lecture the Red Queen on using the correct address. Like she has some control over this. Furious,  I called DHL customer service and they said quote "Were Sorry". When I pressed them about what they were going to do about it, they just said they are going to tell me "were sorry". That is not sufficient  I said, I want you to reprimand the delivery guy, refund my shipping Euros and offer me a free trip to Hawaii on the next cargo jet out of Rochester..and call me with a report on the resulting shame bestowed upon the Rochester DHL staff. The customer service person proceeded to tell me that they could not make outgoing calls from the service center.. and once again they were sorry. "Off with their heads"

Monday, February 16, 2015

Three Fifty Eight Low

This time they got the spelling right
As avid followers of this blog you will know, Buttery Sticks has been featured frequently in blog posts. Its not that we are biased in any way, but he has just created the most interesting and funny moments in our lives that we just have to celebrate them by making them public. Passing out in our kitchen Buttery Drip, inventor of the famous "Purple Drank", Winning the Ivy League indoor mile championship Face Full of Celebration, getting 'chicked' at his first pro 5K Buttery Sticks Gets Chicked (Portman took a beating from Mrs P for that post. Once again we apologize). Having his name mispelled You Made it to the Bigs.  Well, The Stick has done it again. Running his first sub 4 mile at the BU Valentine Invite. He not only beat 4 minutes, but shattered it by 1.75 seconds. Running what was referred to by Lil B as "a three fifty eight low". This makes him one of only 439 Americans to ever accomplish the sub 4 mile.  History of US sub four minute milers. Pretty rarefied air.  Great Job Buttery Sticks! Now go get some purple drank so you don't pass out again.
 
How to Make The Face would like to congratulate Carrot Chopper for her Oscar nomination of best director in the category "Best animated short featuring a flatulent clothespin" for "Portman the Movie". We wish her luck on Sunday.







Friday, February 13, 2015

You made it to the Bigs

You finally made it to the Big Time!  You have been dreaming about this your whole life. The anticipation is palpable...and they misspell your name.